"Weekly" Twitter Tweets

Weekly Twitter tweets from deonandan, since:2009-09-27

Home on a Saturday night, making apple cider. How did I get so domestic?
Oct 18, 2009 01:24 AM GMT · from API

They should give a Nobel prize to the guy who invented the Swiffer
Oct 18, 2009 01:06 AM GMT · from API

New drug of choice: liquid Advil.
Oct 17, 2009 01:52 PM GMT · from API

Talking to high school kids all day…. Sooooo exhausting!
Oct 16, 2009 03:03 PM GMT · from API

:Twitter haiku 195 – “Fan of Olde English / Who insists on speaking thus / A ‘forsooth-sayer’?”
Oct 15, 2009 01:26 PM GMT · from dabr

Attending magnificent lecture by theologian Karen Armstrong. (Yes they let me inside a church.)
Oct 14, 2009 11:38 PM GMT · from API

I’ve been awarded official superstar status by the Novogrod Institute of Superstardom. No, not really… But any day now!
Oct 14, 2009 03:19 PM GMT · from API

All revved up to complain about Via Rail service… and they go and give me an unsolicited 1st class upgrade. D’ohh!
Oct 13, 2009 10:45 AM GMT · from API

Just saw a billboard for realtor named “Punch Sockalingam”. He should be a pro wrestler.
Oct 12, 2009 02:53 AM GMT · from API

And on the 8th day, almighty Zod made pumpkin pie, and he saw that it was good.
Oct 11, 2009 08:15 PM GMT · from API

Um… I like Obama as much as the next guy. But don’t you have to DO something before winning the Nobel prize?
Oct 9, 2009 03:00 PM GMT · from dabr

:Twitter haiku 194 – “As children, Greek gods / Read silly bedtime stories / Penned by Dr Zeus”
Oct 8, 2009 12:14pm

Just saw myself nekkid in the mirror. Damn, I look good! (Oh, there’s my cell phone…)
Oct 8, 2009 11:39am

How can I lose my cell phone in a tiny 1-bedroom condo with no furniture?
Oct 8, 2009 9:46am

: admiring the technological elegance of the locking washer
Oct 7, 2009 5:31pm

I say bah! Bah to all of you!
Oct 7, 2009 12:13am

:Twitter haiku 193 – “Too much anal sex / So much like a contact lens / Makes a brown eye blue”
Oct 6, 2009 3:37pm

I have interwebs at home again! Angels be praised!
Oct 6, 2009 9:17am

:Twitter haiku 192 – “A fatal disease / Contracted from airport food / Terminal illness”
Oct 4, 2009 9:03pm

Is it wrong that I can’t tell where the art installation ends and the recycling bin begins?
Oct 3, 2009 11:20pm

Boogers! Boogers! #bumpinyournuit
Oct 3, 2009 9:57pm

Stopped in Brockville for a Starbucks Americano. The novelty is still fresh.
Oct 3, 2009 9:20am

:Twitter haiku 191 – “Why jack-o-lantern / Unable to father kids? / His hollow-weenie?”
Oct 2, 2009 3:11pm

I’m mixing beef patties and chicken patties into the same burger — just as God intended.
Oct 1, 2009 5:27pm

Having a Caesar for lunch. And no I don’t mean a salad, a Roman ruler or a lead character from Conquest Of The Planet Of The Apes.
Oct 1, 2009 12:01pm

I love it when my doctor’s receptionist wears a push-up bra. I feel better already, and no need for drugs!
Oct 1, 2009 9:01am

If anyone is wondering why I’m not responding to my emails… Oct 1st is when EVERYTHING is due!
Sep 30, 2009 3:29am

The woman next to me on the Via train keeps farting. What fresh hell is this?
Sep 29, 2009 8:59pm

Watching UFC 102. Randy Couture is my hero.
Sep 29, 2009 6:59pm